I come across this a lot in disability inquiries and discussions and I feel this needs to be said.
I know it’s stressful and difficult to put yourself first. My most recent experience at Oga’s Cantina where they convinced me to give up my walker was a turning point for me.
No one will do that again. I need my mobility device. It’s not just for walking as I can hobble on my own with my cane. It provides me with much needed stability as I am wobbly and have random vertigo, rest opportunities as my legs and body become painful from walking and standing, and the ability to handle what little I can do on my visits because my stamina is quickly dwindling as I get older.
If you need assistance. ASK FOR IT.
If you have a child/parent/loved one that needs assistance. ASK FOR IT.
If you are denied something you know is an accommodation that can be provided, ASK FOR A MANAGER/LEAD TO ASSIST.
Don’t be afraid of the whispers and outright rudeness from others. You are within your rights to ask for assistance. SO ASK FOR IT.
I got you.
This was a hard one for me to feel comfortable doing. As a people pleaser being assertive feels like confrontation. It’s easier to ask for my kid than it is for myself. But once you get practice it gets so much easier- both the asking for what you need and the overall experience someplace. Keep at it! And I realize that a lot of people just are not trained or have the experience to do/say what should be done. So you become the person to teach them for the next person. And I’m not mean to them, more flies with honey and all, until I start having to quote the law.