Contemplations of a reluctant videographer
Remember when I said I would try the video thing? I was thinking that it would be the thing needed to spice things up. Sadly this was a learning moment as I really discovered I suck at it. It is also that I didn’t like what I was creating and feel that it’s just not for me. I’m uncomfortable in front of the camera. That’s why I don’t take many selfies. I’ve never been comfortable with the way I look and of course I have put on quite a bit of weight as I have aged and well…you understand right? Getting older sucks. I am also not part of that special group of people that flourish in front of the camera. I become so self conscious and fret over each little thing. I’ve tried to do a few things outside of the few that I did actually post and they were terrible. Oh and don’t get me started on trying to manage a walker one handed whilst looking at my phone. 🤦🏻♀️ So I’ve been reading two books, one I just finished, about finding what is your core and doing that. The first book was really good and called “Awakening Your Ikigai” by Ken Mogi. The second is “The Power of Onlyness” by Nilofer Merchant. They are both really good and according to these books, and just basic observations, I am a Data Nerd🤓. There I said it, again🤣. My big realization is not really big but it makes sense. I will stop trying to be something I am not. I am not a YouTuber video blogger. I am not a flashy InstaGrab photographer and selfie taker. I am not cute and cuddly. Well maybe just the cuddly part🤣.

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